The post Andrew Cuomo Subpoenas Gynecological Records Of Women Who Didn’t Vote For Him appeared first on The Onion. Source...
Firefighters had to rescue a man who got stuck in the chimney of a Connecticut parks building while attempting to...
Jeff Bezos, Amazon founder and the world’s second richest man, wed his fiancé Lauren Sanchez in a lavish, multi-day ceremony...
The post FEMA Head Under Fire After Accidentally Playing Porn On Emergency Alert System appeared first on The Onion. Source...
The founder of instant messaging app Telegram, Pavel Durov, says the more than 100 children he has fathered will share...
The post Shroom for Improvement appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
The post Cuomo Makes 11th-Hour Pass At Female New Yorkers appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
WASHINGTON—Growing increasingly contemplative as he fantasized about a stiff drink after a long day at work, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth...
LOS ANGELES—Confirming that doctors had performed the procedure successfully, sources reported Friday that Sabrina Carpenter had undergone a state-mandated lobotomy...
WASHINGTON—Stressing that the facade informs nearly every aspect of his daily life, Sen. Josh Hawley (R-MO) told reporters Thursday that...
WASHINGTON—After weeks of eliminating what many lawmakers called “frivolous” and “unnecessary” provisions, Congress reportedly passed a blank bill Thursday in...
The following is an open letter from Global Tetrahedron CEO Bryce P. Tetraeder that was included with each copy of The...
An 80-year-old man has told police he was wrong to drive down Rome’s famed Spanish Steps after firefighters had to...
ALTOONA, PA—Saying the pampered 6-year-old seemed to think someone should provide her with a midday meal on a regular basis,...
According to members of the team, the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders received a 400% raise last season, with specific rates having...
Tina Webb, 25, died Saturday night, becoming the fifth assistant that Xander the Magnificent has burned through in as many...
LOS ANGELES—Stressing that it wasn’t their problem and they certainly didn’t have the time or energy to investigate further, the authors...
Van Horne married Blythewood Saturday, turning his bewitched household appliances back into humans. The post Fiona Blythewood and Dexter Van...
The post What Are Our Dietary Restrictions? appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
The post Allergic Swelling Leaves Kristi Noem’s Face Completely Recognizable appeared first on The Onion. Source link...