California has enacted a law to eliminate certain ultra-processed foods from school meals over the next decade, becoming the first...
U.S. travelers have faced mounting flight delays as the ongoing government shutdown causes staffing strain among air traffic controllers. What...
Russell Vought, director of the Office of Management and Budget and a key architect of the ultra-conservative Project 2025, made...
LARCHMONT, NY—Noting the 16-year-old had too big of an inheritance ahead of him to throw it all away, the parents...
BRECKSVILLE, OH—Speculating that the unnamed individual was unable to find the broadcast on even the most extensive of satellite TV...
NASHVILLE, TN—Adding to an already heaping assortment of books, clothing, and photos that reminded her of soon-to-be ex-husband Keith Urban,...
PITTSBURGH—In a devastating setback that could sideline the quarterback for weeks, sources confirmed Sunday that Aaron Rodgers suffered a torn...
The post ‘Task’ Teams Up With Wawa For New Fentanyl Brick Hoagie appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
Paul McCartney Now Openly Referring To Self As ‘Last-Living Beatle’ – The Onion Published: October 10, 2025 Source link...
WASHINGTON—Touting a new crime report as evidence their ramped-up operations were improving American life, Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials announced...
As Immigration and Customs Enforcement operations ramp up across the country, so has misinformation. The Onion dispels common myths surrounding...
Saying it desecrates the late entertainers’ legacies, the families of Robin Williams and George Carlin have strongly condemned OpenAI’s new...
Despite his family’s pleading, Richard Blakely died at age 82 on the nice rug. The post Richard Blakely appeared first...
The post The Onion Investigates: Jeffrey Epstein appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
Supermodel Tyra Banks introduced a warm, drinkable dessert called Hot Mama, describing it as “the world’s first hot ice cream...
Sydney Sweeney Desperately Fishing For Pet Names To Avoid Calling Grown Man ‘Scooter’ – The Onion Published: October 9, 2025...
Randy Faber, 49, died Saturday after a horn impaling his chest confirmed his severe rhino allergy. The post Randy Faber...
CHICAGO—In effort to honor the extraordinarily talented and creative individual, a MacArthur ‘genius grant’ was awarded Wednesday to Arkansas man...
LOS ANGELES—Describing the mood in the clubhouse as eerie and ominous, several members of the Los Angeles Dodgers told reporters...
ARLINGTON, VA—Saying the Pentagon had acted swiftly on an insider tip about the vessel having a “big adventure” planned, Defense...