WASHINGTON—Suddenly appearing at the lectern after emerging from a hole in the floor, a limbless, slippery Robert F. Kennedy Jr....
The Taliban imposed a near-total internet blackout across Afghanistan, cutting off both local communication and foreign access while suppressing dissent....
Randy Faber, 49, died Saturday after a horn impaling his chest confirmed his severe rhino allergy. The post Randy Faber...
Ben & Jerry’s cofounder Jerry Greenfield resigned after 47 years due to parent company Unilever’s suppression of the brand’s social...
ST. LOUIS—According to sources inside the 2006 Honda Civic, area father Michael Lothan’s drive home Wednesday, which took a shortcut...
Despite his family’s pleading, Richard Blakely died at age 82 on the nice rug. The post Richard Blakely appeared first...
Report: It Nice That Linemen Feel Comfortable Showing Off Bare Bellies – The Onion Published: October 3, 2025 Source link...
The post Everyone At Wedding Singles Table Cousins appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
BRECKSVILLE, OH—Speculating that the unnamed individual was unable to find the broadcast on even the most extensive of satellite TV...
WASHINGTON—Calling him “the best man for the job,” President Donald Trump reportedly asked JD Vance Thursday to research whether the...
The post Nicole Kidman Retires Drag King Persona ‘Keith Urban’ appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
The Trump administration claimed that taking acetaminophen during pregnancy might increase autism risk, advising against the common over-the-counter drug despite...
The widow of the recently deceased Leonard Hendrick, 66, would like all single men in the community to know that...
My dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of this man and this woman…and this empty...
The post Mascot Doing Fentanyl Fold appeared first on The Onion. Source link...
WASHINGTON—Marveling at the childlike innocence and naïveté on display from their first-term colleague, members of the U.S. House of Representatives...
OpenAI introduced new parental controls for ChatGPT, allowing oversight over settings and alerts for unsafe content, though teens will be...
LAS VEGAS—Speaking enthusiastically about what he called “a beautiful sport,” President Donald Trump attended a match Monday for the Ultimate...
WASHINGTON—Flipping through all of the options for the sixth time in a row as the clock approached 1 a.m., a...
California has enacted a law to eliminate certain ultra-processed foods from school meals over the next decade, becoming the first...















