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SATIRE NEWS: Trump On Fence About Attending Ayatollah’s Funeral

SATIRE NEWS: Trump On Fence About Attending Ayatollah’s Funeral

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WASHINGTON—Carefully weighing the implications of his presence at a particularly tense moment in relations between Iran and the United States, President Trump told reporters Monday that he remained on the fence about attending the funeral of Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. “If I go, I think it’ll really make me look strong, like I’m fully in charge of this whole operation,” said Trump, who added that the sight of him sitting in the front row during services for the Iranian supreme leader killed on his orders would both project power and demonstrate that he was not without compassion. “But I can’t overlook the likelihood that many of the ayatollah’s supporters will turn out for his funeral, making things a bit uncomfortable. Maybe even dangerous. Plus, it must be an 11-hour flight to Tehran, and I don’t want to travel all that way just to end up sitting next to Obama.” At press time, Trump had reportedly decided against attending, recognizing that his reputation still had not fully recovered from delivering the eulogy at the funeral of Jeffrey Epstein.





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