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Satire News: Tips For Picking Out Running Shoes

SATIRE NEWS: Tips For Picking Out Running Shoes

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With the start of a new year, many Americans will be engaging in new fitness routines, with jogging being among the most popular. Here are tips for finding the selecting running shoes.

Decide the level of cushioning based on if you’re a back runner, side runner, or stomach runner.

Go up a size to leave room for blisters. 

Count how many feet you have to determine your optimal number of shoes.

Salespeople will often allow you to test run shoes as long as they can ride along on your back.

Hokas make you appear both taller and wealthier.

Pause during cutscenes so you can figure out what type of sneakers Sonic is wearing.

Choose a colorway that will complement months of dust.

When trying on shoes, wear the same kind of socks and banana costume you usually have on while running.

Reflective designs can help drivers spot your body laying in the street after they run you down.



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