The Onion’s book critics round up the celebrity memoirs they’re most looking forward to skimming this year.
Explore the list in detail
Why Didn’t More Of You Philistines Go See ‘Larry Crowne’?
By Tom Hanks
The famous actor spends the vast majority of his memoir berating people for not paying more attention to his 2011 romantic comedy.
Nothing About The Sex Tape
By Kelsey Grammer
Honestly, don’t even bother, because this doesn’t mention the sex tape or his divorces at all and just goes on and on about the nature of living an artful life and boring shit like that.
The star discusses her sudden pivot away from the music industry and into the world of competitive waterfowl calling.
One More Slur For The Road
By Mel Gibson
The actor, producer, and director leaves no slur left unsaid in this definitive portrait of a life laden with offensive epithets.
Regrets From A Life Spent Freezing My Ass Off With A Bunch Of Filthy Animals
By David Attenborough
The British naturalist exhaustively lists all the fulfilling and comfortable ways he could have spent his life instead of tediously documenting foul-smelling wildlife.
The Bodies We Leave Behind: The Tears Of Novocherkassk
By Jake Paul
This long-awaited memoir focuses on Paul’s work as a leading scholar on the Cossack extermination and how its perception in modern academia has shaped his life.