SATIRE NEWS: Justin Timberlake Charged With DWI

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Pop star Justin Timberlake, 43, was charged with one count of driving while intoxicated after failing to stop at a stop sign and veering outside his lane of travel in Sag Harbor, NY, with the singer telling the police he “had one martini and I followed my friends home.” What do you think?

“This is why I don’t drive drunk unless my lawyer is present.”

Isaac McCafferty, Pencil Salesman

“Just goes to show there are some problems in life you can’t shimmy and grind your way out of.”

Tracey Puentes, Coffee Mug Curator

“For a man who could easily afford a limo, it’s inspiring that he still drives drunk like the rest of us.”

Aaron Bauserman, Maze Architect



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