SATIRE NEWS: Judge Delays Decision After Learning One Menendez Brother Always Lies, One Always Tells The Truth

LOS ANGELES—Appearing stumped by the convicted murderers’ testimony, Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Michael Jesic reportedly delayed his decision Thursday in the resentencing of Lyle and Erik Menendez after learning that one brother always lies, and one always tells the truth. “Oh jeez, this is tough, and to make it even worse, they say I only get one question,” said Jesic, who threatened to hold the Menendez brothers in contempt of court after they responded to the judge’s befuddled expression by snickering behind their hands and proclaiming “Fiddle-dee-dee!” “I may need to retire to my chambers, perhaps indefinitely. No—don’t do a little jig. Stop it! Order in the court!” At press time, reports confirmed the judge had wasted his one question by asking if both brothers were truthful and he was the liar.