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As Immigration and Customs Enforcement operations ramp up across the country, so has misinformation. The Onion dispels common myths surrounding ICE raids.
MYTH: ICE agents lack proper training.
FACT: Most have been racists their entire lives.
MYTH: ICE raids do nothing to reduce crime.
FACT: A fruit vendor who sold mangoes that weren’t quite ripe is now off the streets.
MYTH: ICE agents are required to identify themselves.
FACT: Most ICE agents are preverbal.
MYTH: My grandmother was deported to El Salvador.
FACT: No one really knows where she was deported to.
MYTH: ICE is violating people’s constitutional rights.
FACT: The U.S. Constitution doesn’t apply in Uganda.
MYTH: ICE exists to protect Americans.
FACT: They’re right behind us, aren’t they?