SATIRE NEWS: High Noon Recalls Vodka Seltzers Mislabeled As Celsius

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Certain 12-packs of Celsius energy drinks have been recalled after a packaging error led them to contain High Noon vodka seltzer instead, posing a risk of unintentional alcohol ingestion. What do you think?

“I’d hate to do damage to my liver when I was just trying to damage my heart.”

Jake Squires, Elevator Tester


“Someone could have accidentally ingested a calorie.”

Theresa Vo, Kazoo Tuner


“And here I was thinking my SSRIs finally started working.”

Sam Bell, Fruit Peeler



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