SATIRE NEWS: Furious Trump Cancels ‘Atlantic’ Subscription After 48 Years

WASHINGTON—In protest of the publication’s coverage of the Signal breach, President Donald Trump announced Thursday that he had canceled his subscription to The Atlantic after 48 years as a loyal reader. “Their more literary stuff remains unimpeachable, but I just can’t stand their political reporting anymore,” said the commander-in-chief, who confirmed that he had just wrapped up a phone call with the magazine’s customer care team and had even rejected their offer of three months free. “Their long-form journalism has stayed on point for years, long after most publications abandoned anything longer than 1,000 words, so it’s a real shame. It’s Mother Jones for me from now on. That, or I try n+1. I’ve been hearing really good things about it from Hegseth.” At press time, a frustrated Trump was reportedly trying to get around The Atlantic’s paywall to read an article about Ali Smith’s new novel, Gliff.