SATIRE NEWS: Former Abercrombie & Fitch CEO Arrested On Sex Trafficking Charges

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Former Abercrombie & Fitch CEO Mike Jeffries, his romantic partner, and a third man were arrested on charges of luring men into drug-laced, outlandish, and coercive sex parties by dangling the promise of modeling for the retailer’s once-defining bare-chested ads. What do you think?

“That’s the same way I ended up working at Wetzel’s Pretzels.”

Dave Boido, Checklist Provider


“I’ll never shop there again without a really good promo code.”

Moriah Cosper, Entrepreneur


“But the sex objects I leered at always looked so happy.”

Cameron Roo, Dexterity Tester



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