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Satire News: Exhausted Friends Slowly Realize They Were Playing Board

SATIRE NEWS: Exhausted Friends Slowly Realize They Were Playing Board Game Wrong Entire 6 Hours

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MILWAUKEE—Growing more despondent as each turn brought them no closer to a conclusion, an exhausted group of friends was reportedly coming to the realization Friday that they had been playing the board game Wingspan incorrectly for the past six hours. “Wait, were we supposed to have set up these goal tiles earlier?” said Elliott Barnes, 31, grabbing the expansive rule booklet to confirm his dawning suspicions that he and the other players had misunderstood fundamental playing mechanics of the game. “Oh, okay, it looks like we were all supposed to discard some food tokens at the beginning, which we totally skipped over. And apparently we should be placing the bird cards in the correct habitat. And now that I look closely, I’m pretty sure a lot of these are game pieces from Stratego that got put away in the wrong box. Goddammit, I knew we should have just stuck to Clue.” At press time, sources confirmed the group of friends was two hours into playing the correct version of the game, which they all agreed was significantly less fun.





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