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Satire News: Drunk Man Doesn’t Like The Way Kumon Logo

SATIRE NEWS: Drunk Man Doesn’t Like The Way Kumon Logo Looking At Him

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CHICAGO—Charging across the street in order to find out “what this motherfucker’s problem is,” local drunk man Garrett Dotson confirmed Tuesday that he didn’t like the way the Kumon logo was looking at him. “Keep staring, bitch, and see what happens,” said Dotson, standing nose to nose with the neutral face floating in the window of the children’s math and reading center. “You think you’re so fucking smart with your dumbass little line mouth and dots for eyes? You don’t know shit. How ’bout you come out from behind the glass and fight me like man. I’m gonna come back tomorrow, and if I see you here, I’m gonna punch your goddamn face in.” According to police reports, Dotson was later arrested two blocks away for attempting to proposition a Wendy’s sign.





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