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SATIRE NEWS: Pigeon Delighting In Eating Chicken Wing Like Sophisticated German Cannibal

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NEW YORK—Buffalo sauce dripping from its beak like blood from a baron’s walrus mustache, a local pigeon reportedly delighted in eating a chicken wing Friday as if it were a sophisticated German cannibal enjoying his forbidden delicacy. According to sources, the pigeon’s eyes took on a crazed glint, and it savored the supple tissues of its brethren fowl in a manner similar to an eccentric billionaire in a Black Forest hunting cabin indulging in human flesh. Reports confirmed that, not unlike a reclusive Bavarian nobleman who has taken in a lost American tourist after their car broke down in a thunderstorm only to serve them up to his esteemed dinner guests as a most exotic and taboo feast, the pigeon daintily picked the meat from the bone of its fellow bird with depraved glee. At press time, much like the German cannibal, the pigeon was said to have developed a peculiar and ravenous taste that could only be satiated by murdering and devouring its own kind.



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