KNOWLEDGE is POWER / REAL NEWS is KEY
New York: Thursday, February 22, 2024
© 2024 U-S-NEWS.COM
Online Readers: 339
New York: Thursday, February 22, 2024
Online: 338
Join our "Free Speech Social Platform ONGO247.COM" Click Here
Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

SATIRE NEWS: Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

🔴 Website 👉 https://u-s-news.com/
Telegram 👉 https://t.me/usnewscom_channel

Ever since his support of an antisemitic Twitter post led advertisers to leave the platform, Elon Musk has attempted to rehabilitate his reputation, most recently by touring the Auschwitz-Birkenau death camp. The Onion examines everything Elon Musk did during his visit to Auschwitz.

Did Donuts In A Cybertruck

Did Donuts In A Cybertruck

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Luckily the vehicle’s engine caught fire before any of the buildings were damaged.

Jotted Down Ideas To Implement In His Tesla Gigafactories

Jotted Down Ideas To Implement In His Tesla Gigafactories

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

A student of history knows there is much to be learned from the past.

Asked People To Play Fuck, Marry, Kill

Asked People To Play Fuck, Marry, Kill

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

The docents were horrified, to say the least.

Said The Nazi Trains Should Have Been Boring Company Tunnels

Said The Nazi Trains Should Have Been Boring Company Tunnels

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Musk stated that it would have made the trip across Germany a lot more comfortable for all the Auschwitz prisoners.

Learned That There Are Better Places To Drop Acid

Learned That There Are Better Places To Drop Acid

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Made Absolutely Pathetic Small Talk With Tour Guide

Made Absolutely Pathetic Small Talk With Tour Guide

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Five times he brought up how much he loved video games like Halo and Among Us, and five times the tour guide was forced to politely redirect things back to the matter at hand.

Repeatedly Did His Wario Impression From ‘SNL’

Repeatedly Did His Wario Impression From ‘SNL’

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

In a vaguely Italian accent, he kept making a face and saying, “Wario is-a not-a antisemitic.”

Asked If They Wanted To Build An Auschwitz On Mars

Asked If They Wanted To Build An Auschwitz On Mars

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

He said that Auschwitz needed to be willing to colonize other planets if it wanted to survive.

Shot Off His Flamethrower At The Entrance

Shot Off His Flamethrower At The Entrance

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Musk said he wanted to make things feel a bit more “epic sauce” because people were “being total downers.”

Praised The Prisoners For Intermittent Fasting

Praised The Prisoners For Intermittent Fasting

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

He repeatedly said it was the only weight-loss method besides Ozempic that really made any impact on his weight.

Tried Mescaline For First Time

Tried Mescaline For First Time

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

After allegedly ingesting LSD, cocaine, ecstasy, mushrooms, and ketamine, he figured the notorious site of one of history’s greatest horrors was as good a place as any.

Asked If The Land Was For Sale For His Next Gigafactory

Asked If The Land Was For Sale For His Next Gigafactory

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

According to Musk, he was very impressed with what he’d seen.

Unveiled Officially Licensed 2023-2024 Apology Tour Merch

Unveiled Officially Licensed 2023-2024 Apology Tour Merch

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

The bestselling item is a $60 hoodie with the slogan “Here Is Video Proof I Am Not Antisemitic.”

Asked Tourists If They Knew Where Grimes Was

Asked Tourists If They Knew Where Grimes Was

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Watched ‘Blue Eye Samurai’ On His Android Phone

Watched ‘Blue Eye Samurai’ On His Android Phone

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

He forgot headphones, so he had to put the speaker volume on.

Checked Out The Bookstore To See If They Had Any Dan Brown Novels For His Flight Home

Checked Out The Bookstore To See If They Had Any Dan Brown Novels For His Flight Home

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Unfortunately, all they had was boring Jewish stuff.

Attempted To Acquire Auschwitz

Attempted To Acquire Auschwitz

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

The Auschwitz-Birkenau Foundation politely declined the billionaire’s offer.

Brought A Sink

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

It wasn’t completely clear what he was going for here.

Made A Few Calls

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

Musk spent the tour FaceTiming executives at Comcast, Disney, and other Fortune 500 companies so they could see how totally non-antisemitic he was being.

Lost Twitter A Few More Million Dollars

Lost Twitter A Few More Million Dollars

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz

To be fair, this is happening every minute of the day no matter where he goes.

Was Filmed Nodding Solemnly For 5 Seconds, Then Immediately Boarded A Private Helicopter That Picked Him Up Right In The Middle Of The Camp

Was Filmed Nodding Solemnly For 5 Seconds, Then Immediately Boarded A Private Helicopter That Picked Him Up Right In The Middle Of The Camp

Image for article titled Everything Elon Musk Did During His Visit To Auschwitz



Source link

OnGo247
New 100% Free
Social Platform
ONGO247.COM
Give it a spin!
Sign Up Today
OnGo247
New 100% Free
Social Platform
ONGO247.COM
Give it a spin!
Sign Up Today