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Chrissy Teigen is getting candid on her relationship with alcohol.
The 39-year-old opened up about her sobriety journey on social media on Thursday.
“Oh man. I’ve been dreading today’s podcast release since the moment we shot it. And that has nothing to do with my incredible guest – @holly. Holly Whitaker changed my life, changed my perspective and changed how I view the f–king beast that is alcohol,” she began in a lengthy Instagram post.
“But to have to admit to all of you: I let it back into my life. to let a lot of you down, oh I feel it deeply. I was so proud every time one of you told me on the street that holly and I made you want to rethink drinking, reframe drinking. I still am. The truth is, I don’t know what I’m doing.”
Whitaker was a guest on Thursday’s episode of the cookbook author’s “Self-Conscious” podcast, where the two discussed Teigen’s obstacles.
“I one hundred percent know I like me better sober,” the model continued. “I one hundred percent know I get more done, I absolutely feel better in my body without it. And I am one hundred percent pissed that I can’t be normal and have a cocktail with my husband on vacay without it turning into eight and feeling like s–t,” she said. “I’m tired of throwing up on a Tuesday. I don’t wanna feel like I need a shot to talk to a crowd. I hate that the thought of maybe having a drink can consume me some days.”
Teigen went on to explain that despite the struggle, her process of sobriety “has changed for the better.”
“I am deeply aware of where this can go if I let it. I guess my plan right now is to continue to be mindful with it. I can go to a concert sober and have the greatest time ever. I can avoid absinthe at the Ren Faire and be so abbbbsolutely full of joy. Photos of my kid’s birthday parties are no longer me with bleary, sleepy drinking eyes.”
Teigen, who shares kids Luna, 9, Miles, 6, Esti, 2, and Wren, 1, with husband John Legend, stated that she knows her relationship with alcohol will never be normal.
“Thank you for allowing me to figure it out openly in front of you all. Anyhow,” she concluded. “This is for all the people who are figuring it out. And to the sober community, god I am still so, so proud of you. Until we meet again.”
Legend, 46, took to the comments section to share his support, writing: “Always proud of you.”
Fans also took a moment to rally around Teigen.
“I read that and my first thought was that you shouldn’t have to feel that you’re letting strangers down. That must be tremendously stressful. I hope you aren’t so hard on yourself,” one social media user said.
A second person chimed in: “Maybe the most honest post I’ve seen on the interwebs??? Is this allowed??? Thank you for being you!”
“Please give yourself a little goddamn grace. 🤍 And thank you for your raw and beautiful honesty,” a third user wrote.”
Teigen’s sobriety journey started in 2021. She’s celebrated milestones within her progress over the years.
“Not a drop of alcohol in 365 days! I miss feeling loopy and carefree sometimes, but to be honest toward the end, it didn’t give that fun feeling anymore anyhow. I drank to end crazy anxiety that later mostly went away when I – get this – quit drinking! sigh. anyhow I feel really good,” she candidly shared in 2022 on Instagram.
She added, “Sometimes I get really frustrated looking back on days I should remember way better than I do because of alcohol. Like when I drank cafe patron and fell asleep while an Outback Steakhouse chef taught me (my friends) how to make a bloomin onion at my house. I wish I was awake for that. Wish I remembered really any awards show lol.”